Me, My Girlfriend & Her Hair (Prologue)

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Orim: The subject of “natural-haired-black” women (henceforth referred to as NHB women) is one filled with opinions. A Facebook page, a reddit page, an “Ask Men” magazine entry and several blogs have offered this subject to the public to contend and wrestle with. As a black man, I’m sure I’m not the only member of my sex and race who has considered this issue.

Now let’s get one thing straight off the bat; you date a woman, not her hair. However, you date ALL of a woman, that includes her hair. Growing up, my mom and three sisters always wore their hair with an attachment, never natural. Synthetic relaxers of various kinds that would take the hair clean off your scalp if left 5 minutes over the limit. So I grew up expecting this of other black women. Proper hair care meant you fixed something different at least once or twice a month- Wig, weave-on, whatever was fashionable at the time. As such, I never felt the need to ponder how a woman decides to carry her hair,until recently….

I don’t know if it’s right to classify it as a rave or a movement but whatever it be, I honestly think it’s a good one(for whoever/group made it popular), nothing like a human being proud of how she/he was made-there is such a thing as perfectly imperfect.

Daezy: Excuse me… (gesticulating and acting as though I’m auditioning for a Shakespearean role….I’m his girlfriend btw)

With skin absorbing the kisses and rays of the sun and hair that defies gravity, for me it’s definitely something magical, something worth showing off with pride!

It’s a bit tedious taking care of the Natural hair especially when there are no chemicals, like relaxers, involved but trust me  it gets easier over time, besides it’s more profitable in the long run when only organic products are used instead of products that contain damaging chemicals.

Orim: What intrigues me the most is the fact that it has made most women adventurously creative; everyone searching “Google” for natural hair blogs for motivation and “Youtube” for videos of styles or homemade products to try out!

So I’m home one day and then my girl friend (who is on the natural hair journey) comes home with groceries. Very excitedly,(and by the way, we eat healthy these days,with she mentioning each time how this fruit or that veggies help the hair or produce some funny stuff..)I sat imagining and waiting on the amazing food that was going to be prepared, only for me, after some minutes had passed, to see the concoction she had mixed up all up on her hair… wondering what she was doing she, with a wide grin, blotted out “it’s a homemade deep conditioner, for my hair to be softer and moisturized”…

I looked on in amazement, that was only the beginning there was more to come…we had entered an era of hoarding- your fruits/veggies/milk/yoghurt or whatever you’ve bought with the hope of seeing it when you get back now turned into a mixture on a female’s head.

The results have been interesting. While I’m not always excited to see my food turned into an in-consumable paste on her head, I must say there’s a sense of pride I feel when she gets asked the “is that your natural hair?” question. 

….Thoughts of a natural hair girl’s young Nigerian boyfriend

Stay Tuned….


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